ITV Digital Jokes

YET MORE THINGS TO DO WITH COWS...........

BIRTS BBC COWS
So we've only got two cows left...we paid far too much for them...milk them 5 times as much as before...they should appreciate the honour of being milked. Don't worry if they leave the milking parlour or drop dead, there are thousands of cheaper cows outside waiting to get into the hallowed milking portals.

ITV Digital:-

You acquire a milking shed in London by offering to pay the Big Farmer more money in rent than your rival who has owned and run the cow shed and milking operation in Teddington successfully for over 21 years.

You don't own any cows as you will only be milking the cows owned by other people. You buy other cows sheds and milking sheds in other parts of the country which do have cows. You sell most of these cows and go into partnership with another cow shed owner so that you can create a virtual cowshed which you hope will rival the flying cow shed run by Farmer Murdoch.

Together you compete with Farmer Murdoch for the right to milk the Nationwide Cow and agree to pay a very large sum of money for you to do so. After a year you can no longer afford to pay for the Nationwide Cow. This is for a variety of reasons including the fact that you can't get enough milk drinkers to buy your milk... especially the Nationwide milk, you can't offer as many milk flavours as Farmer Murdoch, your milk is unavailable to a large number of potential milk drinkers, while your shed leaks so many other milk drinkers are getting their milk for free....and you paid too much for the rights to the Nationwide Cow. Your attempts to try and pay less for the Nationwide cow fail, so you try to sell the virtual cow shed.

There is no buyer, so the virtual cow shed closes with the remaining few cows and herdsmen redundant and a large number of milk drinkers go thirsty....